This is so clever, I have to share it with you. We all need to keep copies of this to hand to those pesky christians trying to convert us to their cult: The Christian Proselytizer Questionnaire:

If you’re reading this paper, it means I’ve given it to you because you were proselytizing to me and you are a Christian. I’m giving you this paper to save us both some time; you see, I’m not a Christian, although I used to be. I’m a secular humanist, and I became one for both logical and emotive reasons.

Since I’ve been a Christian, I do know quite a bit about the religion, although I might not know much about your particular sect. (I use the word sect instead of the word denomination because I think it unfair that Christians get denominations, which is a nice-sounding word, while everyone else gets sects, which is an evil-sounding word.) I became a non-Christian because I didn’t like what I knew about the Christian religion. If you want to even begin attempting to convert me, you have to settle those problems. Specifically, you have to answer the questions below. Answers to each question should be typed or neatly handwritten on a separate sheet (or sheets) of paper, and no answer should exceed 100 words. This is because one of the reasons I left Christianity is that it was so complex, and I’ve found that the simplest answer to a question is usually the right one. Quotes from scripture count for bonus points as long as you can refute other quotes from scripture that contradict the passage that you are quoting. If you return this paper to me personally, or if you mail it to me, and if I think that your answers justify my return to Christianity, then I will get in touch with you. Read more…

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Hallelujah!! I’ve found the Lord! Slavery is OK according to the bible and I get to have one of my very own! I think I might get a breeding pair so that I can grow more. Once you’ve gone slave master, one is never enough, you know. Plus, I can sell the extra for cash.

I just don’t know where to buy my first one. Walmart has knock-off slaves. They may be the least expensive, but they don’t last more than 6 months, so it’s not worth it. I think I’ll try Amazon, they’re great for most stuff. My friend got a slave from them and it was damaged in shipping. They replaced it right away, no questions asked. Plus they throw in an owner’s guide on care and feeding. Slaves can be tricky, so that might come in handy.

And you’re probably about to lynch me for this post, aren’t you? Hey don’t blame me. PZ Myers helped me find the light of the lord. I guess the shining light of reason really goes to Jean, who really is a visionary. She’s a born again christian, who happens to also be black, which in this circumstance only makes her logic so much more compelling. I know that sounds like an ad hominem attack, but no, in fact it is merely an observation. Jean has opened my eyes. Jean is a raging ignorant whackjob moron. Read more…

I found a refreshingly different article titled 10 Morals Atheism Gives Me a bit ago. While most atheists have been asked the typical religious question about how we can be moral without a god, this article dismisses the question as inherently flawed, and makes a statement instead.

In my experience, the bible goes on, especially in the old testament, about how to treat people who are different than you. It’s full of hate and cruelty, with some rules thrown in. Only a few of those rules are sensible. The rest are about control. From the little I know of the quran, it’s even worse.

I’m not going to pick the bible (or the quran) apart. It’s not worth my time and aggravation. If you believe that the bible is the divinely inspired word of god, you’re only going to skim this article, find a few points to attack me while you brew up a cup of moral and righteous indignation, and then try to shove your fundamentalism down my throat because you’re scared of people who think for themselves and don’t have blind faith in fairy tales from the Fertile Crescent like you do. You don’t listen anyway, you just find ammunition then viciously attack. What great role models you are. How very christ-like.

On the other hand, if you are truly interested in breaking free of the iron fist of god ruling your life and keeping you in ignorant fear, you can go to the Skeptic’s Annotated Bible and look around for yourself.

The atheists who read this probably have already read that awful book, because as a general rule, we need to be more educated on religious matters than those militant religious folks that try to tell us how we should believe.

So, onto the 10 reasons atheists are morally superior, in no particular order, and my personal opinion about each one: Read more…

I don’t normally argue the ‘finer’ points of the bible because I’m an atheist; god doesn’t exist, therefore the bible is simply a poorly written book from the Iron Ages. Its only value to me is perhaps a bit of history, but it isn’t even very good with that, because it’s been translated and copied so many times.

That being said, I do have a couple of bibles. Mainly I use the Skeptic’s Annotated Bible when I need one now, though. The thing about being a skeptic/atheist, you have to know more than the “true believer”.

Here are 50 inconsistencies in the old testament that you can keep in your back pocket for arguments.

1. Man was created equal, male and female. Gen.1:27.
   Woman was created as a companion to the man only after he rejected the animals. Gen.2:18-24.
2. Man was created after the plants. Gen.1:12, 26.
   Man was created before the plants. Gen.2:5-9.
3. The birds were created out of the water. Gen.1:20.
   The birds were created out of the land. Gen.2:19.
4. The animals were created before man. Gen.1:24-26.
   The animals were created after man. Gen.2:19.
5. On the first day, God created and separated light and darkness. Gen.1:3-5.
   On the fourth day, God again created and separated light and darkness. Gen.1:14-18.
6. God encouraged reproduction. Gen.1:28.
   He said it was an unclean process. Lev.12:1-8 (Note that bearing a daughter is more unclean than bearing a son).
7. God was pleased with his creation. Gen.1:31.
   God was not pleased with his creation. Gen.6:6. Read more…
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You have different types of extremists in this crazy world today. Each one that I can think of makes me scratch my head in wonder. As in what the fuck is the deal with these nut cases.

The first type I’m going to cover is religious extremists. The types that blow up cars, ram planes into buildings, etc. This really boggles my mind. Why do people kill in the name of some (likely imaginary) god? I’ll state it this way for the religious. If we weren’t meant to think for ourselves, why would god give us a brain and free will? He or she could have easily designed us as mindless robots. So why all the violence in the name of religion? I guess some haven’t evolved into civilized individuals. They still hold on to the values of the dark ages where freethinkers or infidels were burned at the stake. Read more…