Heaving Dead Cats » help

Getting Sick of Militant christians In My Family

Neece — Wed, 13 May 2009 01:43:21 +0000

I just reactivated my Facebook account. (please befriend me, if you like! I’m Neece Campione over there. Just let me know you’re from here!) So much of my family seems to only converse by Facebook these days, so I gave in and finally went back to it. If you can’t beat ‘em…. Oh jeez… I just got a fever and reactivated my Twitter account too (ZeNeece over there) oh the madness!

ANYHOO… where was I? Oh, yeah. Facebook and family. What’s the deal with everyone being so god this, jesus that lately? And they’re so in-my-face about it. I am pretty sure they all know I’m an atheist. Where’s the respect? Why can’t they tone it down? It’s incredibly – dare I say it – offensive to me to have to be bombarded with this sheeple thinking every day. My friends are all atheists (how interesting, don’t you think? LOL), but the family… they’re unbearable. In the last week, every conversation with them has involved their invocation of their holy lord and savior, all to my irritation.

Now, I know you will probably disagree with me, but I haven’t said a word to any of them. I’ve politely ignored the pleas that I pray for them or the requests for a miracle to save them from their bad situations (which they got themselves into … sans god). Being on Facebook really has it in my face even more. They want to chat with me all day and it seems that the invocations to god come fast and furious. It’s maddening. Or the stuff they leave on their pages – it’s like swimming in a pool of religious hallmark cards, and all the papercuts that would cause.

I know that this is my fault. I’ve kept my mouth shut all these years and now they just walk all over me. One of them actually gets really frustrated and snippy with me when I say happy holidays instead of merry christmas. She goes on and on about putting the christ back in christmas all through december. Unbearable. Oh, I should mention, 98% of these family members are in-laws. Yeah, that’s probably important, isn’t it?

So, I feel like I’ve reached a crossroads. Granted, it’s my fault for indulging them for so long. But how do I restore my sanity now? Do I say, ‘HEY, you are all idiots! There’s no invisible sky daddy!” Ok, that’s a bit harsh. Um, do I post pro-atheist stuff all over my facebook page? Hmm, that’s so passive aggressive, and easy for them to ignore, which would leave me where I am now.

I want to be nice and respectful. But no one is respecting me. I’m so sick of their god being thrown in my face all the time. I have a feeling that most of them will be offended by any little thing I do or say, then will pointedly ignore that it was said, and just shout jesus-isms from the rooftops even louder.

So I’m asking for your help. Like I said, I am pretty sure most of them already know I’m an atheist. I give them respect but get none in return. How do I get some sanity back? Is it even possible? Or do I have to just become a hermit in a shack in the woods, and get myself a nice old typewriter? I’m so frustrated!

Help Identify This Microscope!

Neece — Mon, 02 Mar 2009 21:47:28 +0000

I got my microscope! And I need your help. This thing is awesome (I think), but I have no idea what it is. It has no name on it. I have no idea even what the magnification is. I’ve dusted it carefully and now I’m waiting for UPS to deliver the slides and slide covers. I am still trying to figure out how to get a temporary light source to work, then I have to figure out a permanent lighting solution.

Oh… at the end of the technical bits, I need to rant a bit, in case you’re interested.

OK! The slides arrived. I’ve looked up Optical Microscopes and I know more than I did already. Don’t think you’re off the hook though. I still need you.

The eyepiece is removable and is 16x.
There are 4 objective lenses:
- Red: 4/0.1 160/0.17
- Yellow: 10/0.25 160/0.17
- Blue: 40//0.65 160/0.17
- Creme: Oil 100/1.25 160/0.17

So I’m guessing that the first number is the magnification. 4x, 10x, 40x and the oil immersion is 100x. I assume I need special immersion oil for that. What is the next number though? The /0.1, /0.25 etc. And what is the 160/0.17 part?

The light source is supposed to be powered and has a condenser. The cover is broken and there is nothing to hold a light bulb of any type that I can make sense of. It’s made in China, which is immensely helpful in a not helpful way.

So, any ideas on a temporary or permanent lighting solution? I was thinking LEDs would be best because they don’t get so hot. But they can be expensive. I came up with that when I was looking at new microscopes for sale, because all the new ones seem to have LEDs. But a regular bulb of some sort would be good too. I’m not sure of the bulb to get though. So suggestions are most welcome.

Ooh, I love Wikipedia. I found some links to some neat sites. These links really aren’t for you unless you’re a microscope geek wannabe like me. They’re more for me so I can find them easily.

If you have any resources, please feel free to comment with them because I want to learn as much as I can.

Well, I was about to wrap up, when Butch got up. He noticed some things that I hadn’t yet. Namely the number on the back which seemed unhelpful. It’s the model number: xsz-106. Damn, Google is amazing, because the second link down gave me a helpful page. It seems that it’s the xsz-106bn, Biological Microscope. The bulb was a halogen. Also there’s a dimmer switch on the side. Cool, if I can get it to work!

And now for my RANT: I have been very excited about getting this microscope. I understand that not everyone is interested in microbiology. But isn’t the pursuit of science and learning understandable in and of itself? So far, about 75% of the people I’ve told have replied with the same comment. “Why would you want a microscope?”

Why? Why not! The tiny world around us is amazing, complex and wonderful. It still holds secrets we have yet to unlock. It affects us in ways we take for granted, and is beautiful and fantastic. The total apathy and lack of interest is so disheartening. When someone I know expresses an interest in learning, even if the topic is not my favorite, I am delighted and encouraging. Know what I mean? Ok, so microbiology doesn’t interest you. That’s fine. But wanting to learn should always be encouraged. Don’t you think? Are we that apathetic these days, that people think it’s silly to want to educate themselves?

Ok, I’m done ranting. I have the tiny world around me to discover. Once I figure out how to illuminate it! Have a great day, my friends!

Sometimes It Sucks To Be A Skeptic

Neece — Mon, 02 Mar 2009 12:15:30 +0000

I think I understand what it’s like to be lost in a world of woo thinking. Maybe even an inkling of what it’s like to believe in Jesus as your personal hero.

Butch, my awesome husband, came home Friday night and told me he felt awful. He and I both got a cold about 3 weeks ago and he shook if off in about 4 days while I suffered with a nasty chest cold, congestion and laryngitis until just the other day. I didn’t want to hear that he was sick again. It was my birthday weekend, we were supposed to go out to dinner on Sunday (last night), and I was hoping we’d both be feeling well for a change.

Alas, it was not to be. He had a fever, the chills, and was completely miserable. And here’s where I realized I felt totally helpless. I can’t stand seeing someone I love sick. When Butch or my dogs or someone I care about has a problem or is in pain, I want to fix them. I want to make them at least feel better. But sometimes there’s nothing you can do.

Butch seemed to have the flu, which is a virus, and really all I could do was make him a hot toddy, be extra nice, and send him to bed to sleep it off.

Recently my older dog, Koku went through some weird emotional thing where whenever I gave the dogs treats, he would suddenly act like there was thunder and lightning and he would practically jump in my lap and shiver. Which is also new. He just developed a dislike of thunder last year. Poor little fella is anxious like me, I guess. But again, there really wasn’t anything I could do for him, except give him some affection and make sure that he was physically alright. (I can put him on doggy prozac, I guess, but that would make him sleep all day, so it’s a last resort.)

But it’s painful to watch the ones I love suffer. I hate it. In my previous life, I was into taking vitamins and airborne. And before that I (shamefully admit) I believed in energy healing. But back then, I had solutions. I could turn to a concoction or my hands with authority and say, “this will make you feel better.” Butch didn’t believe in the energy stuff, but sometimes he’d let me do my woo woo magic. Because when you’re sick, you just want to feel better, even if it’s a long shot.

Then I figured out that energy healing was totally bogus. Which meant I lost a huge security blanket. It was all a placebo, nothing more. Recently the Skeptic’s Guide to the Universe, along with other podcasts and science news, helped me to become a full fledged Skeptic. (I have a badge and everything!) I learned that taking vitamins have been found to actually shorten your lifespan (a recent study), mega doses of vitamins can be very harmful, and taking airborne as suggested is dangerous, and that it was never properly tested. So, now I have no security blankets at all. It’s just me and bare naked facts and science.

Most times that is quite liberating, not to be weighed down with lies and nonsense. But when my loved ones are sick and there’s nothing that can really be done except fluids and bed rest, (oh, and TLC, of course), I feel really naked and frustrated.

So I guess I understand why people turn to crackpot pseudo-science. I see why they buy ridiculous remedies, books for crazy diets, books for strange magical ways to improve their lives. I guess I even understand people who pray to Jesus for a cure. It might be a long shot, but at least they’re doing something.

Of course, prayer is actually doing nothing. You’re just wasting time and energy on a god that doesn’t exist. But I guess it makes sense, in a way, if you really believe it’s going to work. Maybe it’s just the knowing, the confidence that Jesus wouldn’t let you down, that whoever wrote that stupid book you read really does have the answer and really wants to help you achieve perfect health and happiness. Whatever it is, it’s doing something, it’s keeping you from realizing that the world is often harsh and cold.

But turning to a god that isn’t there, or a pill that doesn’t do anything useful, or a book that is full of lies isn’t doing anything. It might seem like it’s helpful, but really it’s worse than nothing. Sure, you might feel like you have a bit of control over a bad situation, but you don’t. You’ve given what little control you might have had to the invisible god, the sugar pill, or the guru who wrote the book. See? You’re less in control than ever. With no hope of ever getting any of it back when you believe in lies and let them lead you and control your life.

It sucks. I know. But reality is a harsh mistress.

So, I kissed my husband on the forehead, reminded him that a mild fever is the body’s natural way of fighting infections, and told him I loved him. He was upset about my birthday dinner, but I told him it can wait. No big deal, just feel better. Sometimes all you can do for someone is love them. So that’s what I did. Love is good medicine, at least.

OHMYGOSH It’s Going To Be SO COOL!

Neece — Thu, 26 Feb 2009 22:47:14 +0000

Hey everyone! How are you today? Hopefully all is well and good with you! So I’ve been trying to think of something really clever to write about for the last day or so and I’ve had terrible writer’s block. A common occurence for me, I know. Then I realized part of the reason I can’t think of anything to write about is because I actually have something going on in my life! So what else is a blog for but to regale people with the minutae of your life?

My friend Jeff is sending me a real microscope next week! Not like a little toy kid’s one, a real one from a lab! It might need some TLC and I know it will need a light, but he says other than that it’s in good condition. I’m sooooo excited! I have no idea what the magnification of it is, either. He hasn’t even shipped it yet but I can’t stop thinking about it.

I’ve started a list of things I want to look at when I get it. I ordered glass slides which I’ll get on Monday. So this is where you come in. First, I had to tell you because I’m giddy over this. Second, because I need your help. What will I be able to see? I really really want to be able to see bacteria.

I am so weird. Since I started on the path of skepticism last year, I’ve rediscovered a huge love of science, namely bacteria, for some unknown reason. When I listen to all the science podcasts I download, I am always amazed at the bacteriological stories most of all. Like all about e. coli, stories, and about how helpful bacteria is to humans and the world, all that good stuff.

I talked to my sister and she said I probably won’t be able to see bacteria. Which totally bums me out. I don’t know what supplies I might need, either. Do I need fancy stuff? I was wondering if any of you wonderful people have any ideas for DIY microbiology… resources, websites, etc. I mean, if people could figure this stuff out as early as the 1600’s, and see bacteria then, why won’t I be able to see them now?

Either way, I think this will be fun and exciting. I sure hope so anyway. So, if you have any ideas, resources, or suggestions, please feel free to share them! Oh, where will I go to identify stuff I see? Do I need fancy supplies? Ohmygosh, this is exciting! So any suggestions will be greatly appreciated!

Thanksgiving and Family Fundie Nonsense

Neece — Wed, 26 Nov 2008 11:53:14 +0000

Thanksgiving is just around the corner. I’m a bit bummed out that I don’t have a great outfit to wear to dinner on Thursday. Like one of the 30 or so anti-religious shirts my husband Butch I have created on Zazzle and Cafepress with maybe some nice black cargo pants. I just don’t think I could get one shipped to me in time. Maybe if I order soon, I can have something festive for baby jesus’ birthday.

Oh if I only had the nerve. Maybe it’s not nerve but respect for the people who throw the family get-togethers – Butch’s aunt and uncle. She’s a bit on the religious side, so I wouldn’t want to upset or offend her. She’s the kind of christian that I don’t mind at all. I know she’s a christian because she goes to church every Sunday, but we’ve never talked religion and she’s never tried to push her faith on me. She is a good person, one of the few christians I know that I truly respect, because she walks the walk without talking the talk, if you know what I mean.

Her mother, on the other hand, she’s nasty. The typical fundie moron that is unbearable and full of lies and hatred for anyone who actually thinks for themselves. As a schoolteacher, I just wish she wouldn’t be so ignorant about simple facts like oh, I dunno, maybe that we’re not a christian nation, and that the founding fathers created a separation of church and state very deliberately.

She hates Butch and I because we dared stand up for truth and facts last christmas regarding the founding of our country. She was so full of instant indignant rage, spouting poisonous lies about the founding fathers. When Butch corrected her it was really ugly, but she just changed the subject and skulked off. Luckily it was after dessert.

Anyway, it would be nice if she, a freaking schoolteacher, knew that the founding fathers went out of their way to make sure there was a separation of church and state. How blind is she? Doesn’t she know that it protects her as much as me, the godless heathen sitting across from her at the table?

Ugh, lucky for her I’m an ethical atheist, which means I probably will not stick my fork in her eye over the candied yams when they bow their heads in prayer. Then again, maybe it’s just my pragmatism, because no one likes bloodied candied yams.

Speaking of dealing with fundies, I noticed an arguing method that such people use to great effect. Where do they learn this common and slimy method, and how the hell can it be dealt with?

It goes like this: the narrow-minded fundie makes a statement. You refute it with logic. They slide off from that point, never acknowledging that they lost that battle, and immediately attack you with another ridiculous claim that is either A, so outlandish that you are stunned and have a hard time figuring out a rational response to such insanity, or B, it’s got just enough fact in it that makes it hard to refute outright, but easy to believe if you’re a mindless nutjob.

Once you try to refute the second point, if you are lucky and succeed in getting your whole point out, the fundie launches at you with another vicious attack, totally ignoring the previous argument again, keeping you off guard, never letting you get your head together.

Who teaches people to be so calculatingly manipulative? I knew this guy for a couple of years. He was a narrow minded, smart yet mindless idiot, but somehow we got along and I thought we were friends. Last week I mentioned that he had a narrow world view. I know, it wasn’t the most tactful statement and I apologized. He cut off all contact instantaneously.

In an email exchange over the next day or so, he used the technique I just described until it dawned on me, he was going to continue the ad hominem attacks and accuse me of being a heinous person and never ever even acknowledge that I was trying to converse with him, unless he could use it against me. Which he did in twisted ways that frankly boggled my mind.

Finally it hit me. Why the hell was I even engaging with this person? He was a fundie in his own way. I hadn’t realized until then that there is such a beast as the rare atheist fundie, full of the same ridiculous twisted logic and lack of common sense. Bizarro world, that’s what it felt like.

Anyway, I really can’t think of any way to deal with such people except to disengage and not even talk to them. Arguing logic with them is a waste of time and effort, and a source of immense aggravation. They don’t want to argue with you, they want to attack and debase you. It’s pointless, I think.

Of course, I welcome ideas on how to deal with this whole vicious technique. If you’ve had success be sure to share with the class. We all need to know.

Wow, what a meandering path that was! I think I’ll wrap things up by saying THANK YOU.

Thanks for reading, and thank you so much for when you comment. That makes my day. I’m so grateful for so many things, and you are one of them.

And look, I can be happy and thankful for my family, my dogs, my health, my home and all the good things and people that fill my life, and I can do it all without kowtowing to an invisible, angry, hateful, middle eastern, Bronze/Iron Age, childish bully in the sky.

Confessions Of A Recovering Woo Addict

Neece — Sat, 11 Oct 2008 20:42:40 +0000

Lately I’ve been talking to Jane. (not her real name) I am having trouble talking to her, and I think I figured out why. We knew each other about 10 years ago in a state far, far away. We were acquaintances, but we had a lot in common. (here’s where I tell you some dark secrets) We were into many different kinds of woo.

Woo: (n or adj) when you uncritically believe unsubstantiated or unfounded ideas. Short for woo woo, according to the Urban Dictionary, definition 4.

I was into reiki, divination, numerology, you name it. While I was an agnostic back then, I still clung to the idea of a kind of Universal Energy. Not really an intelligence, but kind of “magical” principles to energy that science just hadn’t quantified or qualified yet. I held to the beliefs that ancient societies knew secrets that had been lost. Like the Chinese were better at medicine than modern science, or the Mayans had some secret knowledge about the Universe that we were missing out on, as seen in their calendar stopping in 2012.

My main thing was reiki. If you don’t know anything about it, basically you channel energy from the universe through you into your subject. You get an “attunement” where “sacred symbols” open you as a channel. A reiki master has to administer this attunement which is basically a short ritual.

I’ve never been one for ritual. But I really wanted to cure myself of all that was wrong with me and help people, so even though I didn’t like that part of it, I accepted it. And reiki worked for me. My hands would get really hot when I “channeled” this “sacred healing energy” for people. People would feel better when I did my “healings” for them. They would get better. The anecdotal evidence was positive.

I became a reiki master, actually. I then “attuned” other people so that they could go on and be a practitioner, or better yet, go on and attune others. I really enjoyed it and thought it was doing good for people.

I did a lot of reiki for awhile. I held “reiki circles” where we’d all do reiki on each other to “clear our channels” and heal ourselves. I even had a reiki “healing” center with some friends of mine. We offered “healings” and “attunements” in a clinic. We did talks at different places. One talk was at the hospital for cancer patients who wanted alternative healing methods.

I totally believed in reiki. I developed a set of “reiki runes” which had Japanese writing on them. I then gave divination readings with them. I was pretty good at it too. People came back to me again and again for readings and advice.

I can’t believe I’m telling you this. Personally I’m very embarrassed by how much woo I believed back then. But I’m telling you for a reason. I was really wrapped up in this kind of belief in “magical energy”. It made sense to me. It worked for me. I was good at it. I was helping people.

After awhile, I started noticing several things. At first, since they went against what I was practicing, I tried to ignore them or write them off with different woo thinking. What happened was that one of the women I had the clinic with got really sick with pneumonia for quite some time. At first she still tried to do healings with us, before she knew it was pneumonia. But she would cough and hack and we finally all agreed that she needed to get herself better before she could heal others.

This disturbed me. If we’re healing people by channeling this amazing, loving energy from the universe, how could she get so sick? But this was explained that she wasn’t doing reiki correctly. She was supposedly taking on the illnesses of the clients, instead of simply channeling the energy into them. Basically she was doing it wrong and that is what made her sick. She did it to herself.

She ended up in the hospital. She almost died because she was trying to treat it herself with woo magic at home, instead of the medicine she really needed. Of course, we dutifully went to the hospital to give her more reiki healings.

The other thing that I noticed was that it really didn’t matter much what I did. If the person I was working on “believed” I was healing them, they got better and felt a difference. If they didn’t believe, or were resistant to change, they stayed the same.

It was all about psychology. I did some testing of this theory, more so in the readings I did for people and found it to be blatantly accurate once I was aware of it. If the person believed I was channeling awesome energy, the reading was successful. Even if I didn’t feel connected.

After noticing that it was all about psychology, I finally realized there’s no evidence that this stuff does anything at all beyond the power of the human mind and the placebo effect. And that’s when I started letting go of woo. It has taken some time and education, but now I think I’m actually getting somewhere with skeptical thinking.

Of course, now there’s a skeptical community that I can tap into and get new information from. Which is very nice.

Anyway, back to Jane. She’s still very much into all kinds of woo. Talking to her makes me ashamed of who I was. I think back on how I used to think 10 years ago and I feel embarrassed. I can’t believe I embraced all that nonsense.

Of course, the way that woo is packaged and delivered to people is very slick and shiny and palatable. It’s easy and simple and will cure all your ills if you believe the lies.

I’ve rambled enough for one day. But tomorrow I will have a list of some of The Main Features Of Pseudo-Science. This list is quite helpful for figuring out what is nonsense and what is based on real scientific fact and research.

The Holidays are Fast Approaching!

Neece — Thu, 11 Sep 2008 06:22:33 +0000

It’s September already. Talk of Thanksgiving and xmas is already starting to fill the air. I’m sure by now the aisles of every Walmart in this country are being switched over to the xmas junk. I’ve seen xmas stuff out as early as August in previous years. So it’s just a matter of time.

I’ve been a full on, black belt atheist for about 8 years now. Every year I hate the holidays a bit more. But until just recently I’ve kept my godlessness to myself.

When my sister in law insisted last year that people say merry christmas instead of happy holidays, I just rolled my eyes and kept saying what I was comfortable with, even though it made her mad that I was not keeping christ in christmas.

When we sat around at xmas eve dinner and my aunt’s mother spouted off that this is a christian country, founded on christian principles, I asked my husband not to verbally rip her to shreds, even though she’s a school teacher and we were mortified that a teacher could be such a misinformed idiot.

But I’m in the process of coming out of the religion closet. And the holidays have been a sore spot for years. I find them personally offensive, disgustingly commercial and patently ridiculous.

I don’t want to celebrate them anymore. I don’t want to even pretend just to make the jesus freaks happy, like i have in the past. I’m boycotting the holidays. Not just xmas either, because if you’re going to do it, you might as well wipe the slate clean. So if it’s religious in nature, I’m not having anything to do with it.

I have no idea how to make this work. Helpful suggestions are welcomed. For instance, my husband’s sisters plan to stay here for xmas. Yes, the same sister in law that likes Hitler. (I’m still like, WTF over that). The same sisters that take 4 hours to get ready to go anywhere every single day.

Anyway, their parents will stay elsewhere, but are expecting to come to my house for xmas dinner. They did it last year and it was torture. I can’t stand it again. They actually prayed and everything.

So if you have any ideas about how to get out of this gracefully, please help!

The other parts, well, they won’t be easy either. Like gift exchange. Sure it’s nice, but it’s got to go. Vapid commercialism is disgusting.

So, when I get invited to my Aunt and Uncle’s for xmas eve dinner, how do I handle that too?

I have some ideas. Like, we’ll go to xmas eve dinner, not exchange gifts, and enjoy family and friends and good food. And that’s that. But xmas dinner at my house, no. I have to get out of that. That just can’t happen here. Not gonna happen. I’ll go ballistic if it does. I’m tired of being bullied by christians by this stuff.

Opinions, suggestions and ideas are most welcome!

Heaving Dead Cats » help

Getting Sick of Militant christians In My Family

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Help Identify This Microscope!

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